Spoiler alert! If you haven’t watched the season finale of Downton Abbey stop reading now.
Really, if you haven’t seen it stop reading or don’t blame me for telling you part of what happened.
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In the last episode of Downton Abbey, Isobel Crawley tells Lord Merton she can’t marry him. She refuses to live the last years of her life with children who do not like her and say they never will.
Never mind these are not small children they are Lord Merton’s adult children. Isobel Crawley gives up love, a position in society and amazing gardens because of bratty adults.
Did she do the right thing?
As a blended family mom I’m conflicted. True, the widowed Crawley has already had a child, seen him married, buried and has a grandson. She’s experienced a lot of living in her many years, has good friends and no serious need of someone to support her. That does make it easier to send someone away.
But…
She let love slip away.
She wasn’t willing to see if God had an amazing plan for her.
She wasn’t willing to see if those adult children would come around and find a way to at least like her.
I find it sad she wasn’t willing trust that love can work miracles. While I watched the last show, I understood her reasoning and for a second considered she was making an admirable choice by not bringing discord to Lord Merton’s home. After all, would he continue to feel a deep love for her if his sons refused to accept her? Perhaps even refused to come home for holidays?
Blended families didn’t have the help that’s available now. Maybe that’s one of the reasons she didn’t marry Lord Merton. Would she have made a different decision if she’d had someone to discuss this with? Another couple whom married despite objections and found a new world of love?
Something to think about.
For me, I’m so glad I was willing to remarry and blend a family. It was hard at times but so worth it. I don’t mind telling others-wrote a book about it so others considering blending would be aware of issues and find a way to work through them.
It isn’t always fun, but hey do you know a family where every day is like a trip to Six Flags?
Check out the book. We’re Not Blended We’re Pureed a Survivor’s Guide to Blended Families.
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